Courtney Love revealed she was on the verge of death: "Doctors told me I would die, I weighed 45 kilos"

Courtney Love revealed in a video posted on Instagram that she nearly died in England in 2019. The widow of Kurt Cobain and leader of the legendary band Hole said she had kept the health crisis private until now, and did not specify the exact nature of her illness.

"I went to England in 2019, and when I got there my body just exploded," Love said. "I was in hospitals a lot. I almost died, I lost all my hair. I weighed about 100 pounds (about 45 kg), and they told me I was going to die — and I didn't believe them."

Love linked her refusal to accept the doctors' prognosis to a childhood memory: "When I was a child, I would interrupt the patterns of the adults. They would say that red is blue, and then I would see blue, but blue was blue, and then I would gaslight myself that maybe they were right... and my head would explode."

"I never really lost the ability to see that red is red, even though they told me that red is blue. So when they told me I was going to die, I just didn't believe them. And somehow, I got better. I am healthy, and it's amazing."

Later, she clarified: "I just wasn't public about the fact that I was sick. I don't want to be public. I'm okay now."

Love has not released an album since Hole's 2010 record, "Nobody’s Daughter." She admitted that the commercial failure of that project was a humbling experience: "It was humiliating—performing at 11 a.m. while Limp Bizkit and 30 Seconds to Mars were headlining the evening."

Now, according to Love, the next album is finished. "It's ready. It's a really good album. I put a lot into it," she said, noting that she is currently figuring out the rollout strategy. "Thank you for waiting. Just hold on with me, be a little more patient."