Salary and "field improvisation": How Rebbetzins are conquering Europe
Rebbetzins and Jewish community leaders in Europe face challenges that rarely receive a platform, yet resonate with every woman. This initiative, now in its fourth year by the Conference of European Rabbis, supports them in a role that carries great responsibility and power, but lacks formal training.
In recent years, it is impossible to ignore the success of the personal development trend. Whether through retreats, leadership conferences, or women's empowerment, it has become a necessity rather than a luxury: long-term self-investment to gain life tools and a community.
Despite the variety of such events, I recently took part in a unique leadership seminar for the Rebbetzins (rabbis' wives) of European Jewish communities.
The seminar launches the development program for European Rebbetzins (PALA), initiated by the Conference of European Rabbis — an organization representing political-Jewish interests, bringing together about 1,000 members and 800 active rabbis from Dublin to Vladivostok. The program was founded four years ago at the request of key women in Jewish communities across the continent.
The Conference of European Rabbis is responsible for about 50 seminars and training courses, including training for rabbis, scribes (soferim), mikvah attendants (balaniot), and kashrut supervisors. Now, it includes training for Rebbetzins—a need arising from the difficulty of entering the role without prior preparation.
"A leader equals worry"
"It is a complicated task," says Rebbetzin Yemima Mizrahi, who participates in the program. "A leader equals worry. In Hebrew, the expression 'lid'og' (to worry/care) means both being worried and taking care of someone. There are no Ten Commandments for a community Rebbetzin, and no women officially held this position before them. They constantly have to improvise in the field, so the seminar is a huge boost."
The need for community is essential for emissaries from Israel moving their lives abroad. The seminar was attended by key women from London, Madrid, Strasbourg, Amsterdam, Belarus, and Palma de Mallorca.
"As a kosher-keeping family on a tourist island, we don't have the simple option of going out to a restaurant to blow off steam," shared Bat-Chen Bar-Geva, the community Rebbetzin in Palma de Mallorca, regarding the difficulties of adapting.
During the three-day seminar in Munich, alongside professional content, the common denominator of the difficulties faced by community leaders surfaced—challenges that even the Tel Avivian writing these lines can identify with.
"We come out stronger"
One central topic was the difficulty of loneliness. Moving abroad, far from family support, and dealing with daily role pressures create tensions within the family unit.
The community of women at the seminar became a shoulder to lean on and a safe environment for sharing. For participants, the seminar is the first step in maintaining these connections—with support from the Conference of European Rabbis, which continues to accompany them via Zoom meetings.
This also applies to challenges within communities, from integrating families from intermarriages to issues faced by Israelis who immigrated to Europe. The meeting allows them to consult on ongoing work and even conduct a dialogue on a sensitive topic: money.
In the past, Rebbetzins were not paid, unlike the rabbi, but the scope of responsibility required by the role has led to the question of whether to price their work and how.
The soul of the community
Moria Nagar, a social worker and CBT therapist from the Sderot International Resilience Center, on behalf of JReady (a joint initiative of the Ministry for Diaspora Affairs and the Jewish Agency), conducted a workshop focusing on "resilience in the Rebbetzin role" and provided practical tools.
Hodia Stiglitz, Director of the Department for Combating Antisemitism and Community Resilience at the Ministry for Diaspora Affairs, explains: "The Ministry works continuously to strengthen the readiness of Jewish communities. The activity at the Rebbetzin conference is an example of the importance of empowering local leadership."
Shirley Gil-Reiz, Director of JReady, adds: "Rabbis and Rebbetzins are a central anchor of leadership for community resilience. Providing professional tools is a necessary step that allows them to continue to lead and support their communities."
"They are the most important player in the community rabbinate," emphasizes Gadi Gronich, Chief of Staff to the President of the Conference of European Rabbis. "I wanted to give them tools, to say thank you—which no one says—and for the community to recognize the role of the Rebbetzin and pay. They are essentially the soul of the community. We built the program based on their needs, and we are constantly advancing," he concluded.
