Want to start over? The American guide to legal disappearance
In the United States, an adult who has decided they want a new life has the right to unilaterally disconnect from their family, and authorities are forbidden from interfering. Thousands of Americans do this every year. An industry that has developed around the phenomenon teaches how to do it without being tracked, including memorizing your invented life story.
If Meli and Liel Yahalomi had decided to start a new life in the US, it is likely that at least one very unpleasant thing would have been avoided: a video of the moment the police found them. In the US, it is an adult's right to disappear. If the police locate an adult reported missing and discover that they are safe and sound and chose to leave of their own free will — and there is no reason to arrest them due to criminal suspicion — they are not permitted to disclose their location to anyone, including their family.
Therefore, if the two had told the American police: "We are here of our own free will, we are healthy and do not want anyone to know where we are," it would have been forbidden — according to the Privacy Protection Act — to provide the family, the media, or the public with any clues about their location or the reasons that led to their departure. The police would have contacted the worried family members, confirming that the two were safe and sound and had chosen to cut ties of their own free will. The public would have received a similar notice so that the phones would stop ringing at the 911 call center, and that would have been the end of the story.
It is very difficult to disappear completely today, even in the vast US. There is no exact official figure regarding the number of people who disappear voluntarily each year, partly because of the very pro-"everyone-can-leave-home-and-let-everyone-else-jump" law. However, general data from law enforcement agencies provide a broad picture of the scope of the phenomenon: every year, about 600,000 reports of missing persons are filed in the US. Between 97% and 99% are found or return home on their own within a few days or weeks. A large part of these cases are defined as voluntary departure, for example, teenagers running away from home or adults who decide to disconnect temporarily.
According to data from the FBI's National Crime Information Center, out of hundreds of thousands of reports, only a very small percentage is officially classified as kidnapping or forced disappearance. The vast majority of cases that do not involve immediate danger are classified as people who left by choice. A large portion are women fleeing violent husbands. Only a few thousand people remain classified as missing for more than a year.
Disappearing is a lot of work
Once, it was possible to leave a large city in the eastern US, travel to a small town in the Midwest, and start a new life without much effort. Today, such voluntary disappearance requires much more work, including deleting all digital traces and evading more than 85 million surveillance and security cameras — one camera for every 4-5 Americans.
First of all, it is advisable that the decision to disappear is not an escape from debts or an illegal act. US law enforcement authorities have no sense of humor in these cases, and the disappeared person will go to prison for even longer after being caught. After that is off the table, you can start planning. Experts on disappearances — there is, of course, an entire industry that makes a living from this — recommend starting with the understanding that you are alone, but opinions are divided on whether you can tell one person you trust 100%, or even not him.
One reason to tell this person that you intend to disappear is that if no one knows, someone will report that you are missing, which will lead to a large-scale search operation that sometimes also involves the FBI. And you don't want them to look for you. But, even if you tell someone, don't tell them exactly where you are going. Then you need to understand who you are hiding from. If it's from the family, then how much do they care if one day you disappear. And if it's the US government, then forget it. It will find you everywhere. And if it doesn't find you, in most cases it will be because you are no longer alive.
Another recommendation is to get rid of all personal belongings — from destroying photos and souvenirs to leaving the car where it might be stolen. A completely new persona. From here, the really hard work begins.
"It requires a lot of preparation," explains Jason Hanson, a former CIA officer who runs a popular YouTube channel dealing with self-defense, privacy, and survival. "You can't wake up in the morning and decide to disappear just because at night you saw a movie where someone disappeared in a few minutes."
First of all, complete disconnection from the internet. Deleting all social media accounts and disconnecting every digital connection, including credit cards and online banking. You need to take all your money out of the bank (slowly, so as not to attract attention) and cut up the ATM card. Welcome back to the cash world, it's the only way. Mobster Whitey Bulger — who managed to evade authorities for 16 years despite being second only to Osama bin Laden on the FBI's most wanted list — was caught in 2011 in California with $800,000 in cash. You also need to blur the information that various companies have about you. For example, call the electric company and ask to "fix" the spelling of your name, your social security number, your home address. It is mandatory, of course, to use only a burner phone. No more smartphones for the foreseeable future. Then you need to create a completely new persona, one whose invented background you will know well and which will also be credible in conversations with people you will meet from now on. You need to become a method actor on the level of Daniel Day-Lewis: change habits, hobbies, and of course, a 180-degree change in appearance and style of dress. It is better to travel to a place you have never been and that is big enough to absorb you easily without anyone noticing. The myth that "you can disappear in a small town" is romantic and Hollywood, but maybe it's not worth being the new stranger who arrives from outside and everyone talks about.
Ultimately, you need very good reasons to decide to enter a journey of closing the door without ever looking back. It is a difficult path in every respect, but sometimes, apparently, there is no choice, and if you are not breaking the law, in the US they will let you vanish into the ground. Frank Ahearn, who works helping such people, writes in his book "How to Disappear":
"You don't just fake your death, buy some fake documents in an alley, and then retire to a life of leisure on a small island nation. Disappearing, and doing so legally and without causing a bigger headache than the one you are running from, requires careful planning. You have to be prepared to cut ties with everyone you know, to change everything you are. Disappearing means being prepared and strong enough. Otherwise, you will waste a lot of time and money trying to disappear, but you will fail."
